“If you then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will the heavenly Father give the Holy Spirit to those who ask him!" Luke 11:13
As I read through this morning’s Gospel, I was struck by what I thought was hopefully, a novel and interesting topic: Biblical parenting skills. In this passage we have Jesus making some rather telling observations on parenting from a man who was, as far as we know, childless. He talks about keeping the doors of the house locked up when the kiddoes are in bed. Good idea. He then goes on to talk about feeding children some interesting things: snakes and spiders. I have known some fussy eaters in my time, but I have to say baiting and switching on the dinner menu was never a good mealtime strategy.
Now, I think Jesus’ suggestions on how to parent your child are interesting suggestions in a very long line of actions on the part of Biblical parents whose own parenting skills were, well, questionable to say the very least. There is quite a list of parental behaviors that are real head scratchers, and just plan psyche damaging if we really think about it.
I mean, we have those original rivaling siblings: Cain and Abel. Now, I will grant you that Adam and Eve may NOT have had any real help or example of how to be a parent, but raising two sons who were such polar opposites could not have been easy. and they really could have used some heavenly assistance and guidance in helping these two learn to deal with each other.
Raising Cain.... and Abel, for that matter, ended up in disaster….you know how that story ended. And that was just the beginning of a long list of parental gaffs and missteps.
Then there is Lot, you may recall him as a relative of Abraham who lived in the debased city of Sodom. The one whose wife would later turn into salt, but that is a story for another day and another relationship. Lot just did not have a real handle on what were healthy familial relationships. As he shelters three angels in his home, he offered to send out his daughters and a concubine who just happen to live with him to be ravaged by the mob that gathered outside his home demanding that he hand over his angelic visitors instead.
And then there is Abraham himself. When his wife, Sarah, realizes she is barren and unable to conceive a child, she hands over her maid to Abraham who bears his oldest son, Ismael. When Sarah’s jealousy rises to unbearable levels, Abraham sends his son and his mother, Hagar, out into the dessert with only a limited amount of water knowing full well that he was condemning them to certain death. Only by divine intervention did Hagar and Ismael find redemption and did not perish in the heat and the sand.
Abraham did not fare so well with his second child: Isaac, the child of Sarah’s old age. When commanded by God to bring Isaac to the mountain top to offer as a sacrifice, with a heavy heart, Abraham was ready to sacrifice his son, bound him, laid the him on the bed of sticks and wood on the altar and was about to plunge his knife into the boy as an angel of the Lord stilled his hand for this was a test of faith. I always wondered what kind of relationship those two had after that encounter. I am sure it had an impact on how Isaac parented his children those raucous twins: Esau and Jacob.
Rebecka, Isaac’s wife, gave birth to two very different sons in this set of twins. Esau was a rough and tumble kind of guy and his younger brother, Jacob, was more cerebral. Jacob was his mother’s favorite, and he knew it. He was smart and crafty, and at the rare age of 15 had “swindled” his older brother out of his birthright. When their blind father was close to death and asked for his firstborn con to enter his tent for his blessing, Rebecka disguised the younger twin who was able to trick his father into bestowing the special blessing on him instead of his elder brother. This resulted in a real family feud, and Jacob took exile in the land of his mother’s birth and then wound up marrying not one, but two of his cousins….Talk about a troubled family…this one really put the “fun” in dysfunctional!
And remember, these were the righteous ancestors of Jesus. No wonder he struggled with fitting examples of good parenting, there was plenty of questionable parenting in that family tree.
But the crux of today’s Gospel is not how poorly some parents have done in helping their children to grow and thrive. It is about our relationship to the living and loving God who has created us all and who is ready to bestow his Holy Spirit on us all. We are but mortals who struggle in our everyday lives, in our relationships with family, friends, spouses and children. We need to stop, sit quietly, breath deliberately and make the time and place for the Spirit, that the Father is waiting to give us; can find that space in us where it can dwell, grow and nurture us in ways that will help us nurture those around us as well.
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