Excuses, Excuses, Excuses.....

When I am driving around in my car or before I finally doze off of an evening, I am listening to Nation Public Radio often referred to as NPR. I like it better than listening to music because I often learn new and interesting things, but, not so today. Today I heard a boat load of poor excuses about why it is unfair for schools to have dress codes. And just so you don't think it is only the students who are upset with dress codes, all of the call-ins from today's show came from parents...mostly mothers who were adamant that dress codes were discriminating against their daughters.

It seems that in several New Jersey school districts the intermediate and high schools have dress codes that the moms feel are harder on the girls than on the boys. The boys are not allowed to wear saggy, baggy pants, oversized tee shirts, sleeveless tee-shirts, and baseball hats perched backwards on the head. In the intermediate school in which I taught, all hats, except those for religious purposes, were banned, but that was New York City, and we had some gang related issues going on.

The suburban girls, on the other hand, are banned from wearing spaghetti strapped tee shirts, very short Nike shorts, except for gym, anything that reveals underwear, and any other item deemed "too provocative". FYI: "provocative" is determined by the school administration. Several of the school districts have cited that the boys become distracted by what the girls are wearing. The moms propose that this is insulting to the boys since it is assumed that they cannot control themselves. I have to say I agree with Mom on this statement.  How are we raising our sons if we assume they are easily distracted from important work? School Districts...listen up; that excuse is bupkis.

Now I went to a high school that was all female, and we had uniforms. So my perception of a "dress code" is slightly skewered. But I think I would err on the side of the school administration. Teaching adolescents and pre-adolescents is quite a roller-coaster ride. There has to be someplace that our children can go to where they learn acceptable behaviors.  It was once said that "clothes make the man", and that is still true today as it also makes the successful woman.

And I understand that the moms have their excuse. Such as:

1. There are slim pickin's at the mall when it comes to teenagers and clothing.  Most of the styles mimic what is seen in the mass media, and what is worn by their role models...if you want to call Miley Cyrus  or Kendall Jenner a desirable role model for your child.

2. The kids need to be accepted by their peers, so they have to dress like everyone else who also shops at the mall.

3. The parents don't want to say "NO" to their children.

4. The children will figure out a way to wear the "school offensive" clothing anyway, so it is just better to buy it for them so they don't have to sneak around. Not sure I get this one.

5. The moms want the children to always feel good about themselves and have no negativity in school. Sorry, Moms...it is school...sometimes kids need two or three explanations before they "get it". We all learn differently.

And yet, there are other times when parents become upset about things that they perceived as just plain wrong....some of these things would fall into their category above.  You know, just fashion.

This afternoon there appeared an interesting headline in my local newspaper: " 'Boo-Bees' tee causing a real buzz".
It seems that a local shop owner and her nineteen year old daughter designed this orange tee shirt with strategically placed bees on the front for Halloween. They sold all of their limited stock of 28 tee-shirts in record time. Since October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month, they decided to run a new batch of "Boo-Bees" in pink to sell at the local Breast Cancer Awareness Walk this Sunday as a fund raiser for cancer research. Sounds not so bad, right? 

Well, the shop in which these are featured is a clothing store aimed at pre-teens.  Some local parents are in a tizzy over the "inappropriateness" of this garment. I am currently wondering on which side of the dress code issue these folks would sit.


My favorite quote is from the store owner who reportedly said, "If you don't like the shirt, don't buy it for your daughter. I'm not grabbing you by the neck and throwing you in the store." Kind of like her own excuse?


Now, I understand how difficult it is to find age appropriate clothing for girls in intermediate and high school to wear to school that are both functional and comfortable.  Perhaps pressure needs to be put on manufacturers and not the schools who are trying to deal with this dilemma or fashion versus function.




I guess everyone has an excuse or two about teen fashion.