That Disappearing Generational Layer

So, this morning I attended  the funeral service for someone I have know for about 25 years.  He was a member of Trinity Lutheran Church on Staten Island, and was a loyal volunteer for their feeding ministries.  He was  also a veteran of the US Navy having served during World War II.  Artie was a year younger than my Uncle Bill who died in 2011; he also served in the Navy as a very young man during the same war.

The Mardasson Monument @Bastogne

My Father would have been 96 this past month.  He also served his county during the war in the Army.  A few years ago I was able to visit Belgium where my Father spent the winter of 1944 during the Battle of the Bulge. I went to Bastogne to see the Monument there dedicated to those who fought in that battle.

My Father was wounded badly in that encounter.  He barely survived and spent the rest of his life with shrapnel in his leg and in the back of his skull.  He had a hearing loss in one ear and later in life the shrapnel in his head which over time had become covered in scar tissue, caused other neurological problems.  In addition, he showed symptoms of what we now call "post traumatic stress syndrome".  After watching any movie or  TV show that depicted the war like "Combat", a popular 1960's show, he would have horrific nightmares. I don't think any of these men ever really spoke about their experiences.

Additionally there were the women, strong women who lived through the Great Depression, World War II, The Korean War, the Cold War and the Vietnam War.  They saw their brothers and sweethearts go off to one war, some returning and others never seen again, and later watched with baited breath as they then sent their sons off to fight a  war in an Asian nation so very far away. My mother was one of these women, as were my aunts and the mothers of my friends growing up in Brooklyn.

I remember one woman in particular.  She was a widow supporting her three children as a school teacher.  Her eldest son had been in ROTC in college and was sent of for a tour of duty in Vietnam.  I remember his fiancé was a pert and pretty blond, and they are a "Ken and Barbie" couple.  But their future was not to be as he was killed in that war.  I attended his funeral, but I don't remember exactly why.  It was very sad to realize that his fiancé would be a widow before she was a bride, but his mother was doubly bereft: no spouse to share her grief and still needing to carry on and support her remaining children.

These folk were of a strong stock.  They lived everyday lives and loved extraordinarily and unconditionally.  And they are quickly leaving this earthly veil. That generational layer that separated us from the past is fast disappearing, and soon we will be in their places. Those of us who are their sons and daughters have huge shoes to fill, and a huge responsibility to honor their memories.  Let us hope we are up to the task.